The Dark Lord's Guide to Dating (and Other War Crimes): Guides to Villainy and Love, Book 1 Audible Audiobook – Unabridged

In this riotously funny dark romantasy, a conflicted villain and his unstoppable bride form the realm's most chaotic alliance."What's mine, stays mine."Step One: Kidnap someone cute.Step Two: Force her into marriage.Step Three: Try not to get feelings.When Dark Lord Kazimir Blackrose kidnaps Lady Arabella for a forced marriage, he expects an obedient, trembling bride. What he gets is a knife to the throat and a furious woman with her own terms. He may need her heroic bloodline to achieve ultimate dominion, but she's not about to make this easy for him.Arabella has already survived her father's tower prison and a lifetime of being treated like property. Being abducted by the realm's most notorious villain is just another Tuesday. If she must be married to the infuriating (and infuriatingly attractive) Dark Lord, she'll do it on her terms: freedom within his fortress, hands strictly to himself, and complete honesty about his plans.But when his plans go awry, Kazimir faces his most terrifying challenge yet. He must actually date his own wife. Between magical training sessions, playing golf with the eyeballs of his enemies, and aphrodisiac dinners gone spectacularly wrong, his villainous seduction plans are failing at every turn.As they navigate magical explosions and jealous exes, they discover a far more terrifying prospect than war or magical catastrophe:They might actually be falling for each other.For fans of Assistant to the Villain, but darker and spicier, this sexy fantasy romance is perfect for those who love: a morally gray antihero (who stays that way); a strong heroine who embraces her dark side (she doesn't need rescuing, thanks); touch her and die; hilarious, wicked banter and sizzling spice; one bed/forced proximity; kidnapped bride/forced marriage; dark humor. Read more